i’ve been thinking about all those posts about “we need female heroes who do girly things”/”why is the female hero always such a tomboy” and then the response posts that are like “uhhh actually we don’t really have any really masculine female heroes either” so i was trying to figure it out—what do we have, exactly?
and really what we get is women who eschew “girly” things while still managing to look like society’s ideal woman. they would never touch eyeliner (they’re too busy with Important Things), but their eyeliner is immaculate. they have a huge, varied wardrobe, but wouldn’t be caught dead actually shopping for clothes. and it reminds me of the expectation that women must be effortlessly beautiful. don’t wear makeup or you’ll seem self-absorbed—but god forbid you look like you’re not wearing makeup. it’s interesting to me, that the impossibilities imposed on female characters are the same ones imposed on real women.
— Margaret Atwood, The Robber Bride (via corpsicles)
if your “pro-black woman” movement does not include hoodrats & ratchet black women, because “theyre not queens/theyre setting black women back”, your movement is bullshit and I want no part of it
any movement that segregates my sisters into “good and respectable” and “bad and deserves disrespect” categories is harmful and bullshiterious
Anonymous said: I saw the ask claiming that people only criticise women for poor acting....but I see bad actors get dragged routinely on recap sites no matter gender. YFAS fans were pretty clear that Kim Soohyun didn't match Jun Jihyun's skills. And I don't see what's sexist about pointing out that Jin Se Yeon is a bad actress based on her performances. Jaejoong's no Oscar winner but even he's better than that (and people hate Yunho's acting too). But Park Shin Hye gets unfair criticism for kissing scenes tho..
Hello, Anon! What you’re describing in your ask is actually a false equivalence that plagues all discussions on the treatment of women and men in the media.
A false equivalence is a logical fallacy in which one believes that because two things appear to be the same on the surface, that they are and should be treated equally but in fact, there is no evidence to suggest they are actually equal. For example, dogs and cats are both soft, furry animals, so your experience with them will be exactly the same because you treat them equally. Anyone who has been around cats and dogs knows that is untrue.
By stating that because both women and men are humans their experience and treatment is the same, you are making a false equivalence because in life women and men are not treated equally.
And when you look at that through the lens of the media, it is hard to say with any sort of legitimacy that women and men not only receive equal criticism, but that the criticism they do receive is of the same kind and intensity. Go onto any site that discusses actors, actresses, and their characters and read both the article and comments. In order to get a balanced data set, make sure you do this for several different articles.
What you will find is a data set that shows there is a bias. You will find an overwhelming about of hate for women and lukewarm criticism of men. What is also important to notice is the kind of criticism actors and characters receive. What is often excused in men will rip apart women.
Part of establishing this false equivalence is that harsh criticisms of men, like the one you mentioned with Kim Soo Hyun, are so rare that they are memorable, so they become the example to derail this argument every time when this topic is brought up when say someone wants to point out Park Shin-Hye’s kissing scenes aren’t up to their standards. It is important to notice that her male partners don’t receive the same level of hate.
It is very easy to forget that we live in a highly sexist (and racist) society. We don’t like to admit that these oppressive systems impact our thoughts and behaviors because we don’t want to believe that we are sexist and racist. We want to believe we are treating women and men equally when we complain about them but the truth is we can’t escape that our culture is built on oppression.
The best way to combat this in ourselves is to take a step back from our assumptions and look at what is really happening. The surface is misleading.
This is why Audrey and I are so vehement in our defense of women and care very much how they are portrayed in the media. We want to live in a world where not only are female characters written well, we want the women who portray them to be treated with respect.
also the defense of the few men who do get critiqued is so swift and loud and overwhelming, while the defense of the women who get critiqued is like barely there (which is why fkdf is so great!)
3 years ago, Moya asked me/challenged me to think about “why do we desire what we desire?” I am still stuck, but I think of that question…often.